So, whoever made this has taught me more in this one pic set than 12 years of grade school, 4 years of college and my ongoing years in law school.
In summary, “To avoid…use…”
- Foot injuries: Shoes, not crocs or flip-flops
- Head injuries: Helmets for bikes etc.
- Drowning: Pool safety
- Sunburn: Sun protection
- Swimmer’s Ear: Drops of Mineral oil or Hydrogen Peroxide after swimming
- Dog bites: Keep young kids away from dogs
- Food poisoning: Hand washing and caution around spoilable foods at picnics
- Heat exhaustion: Drink LOTS of fluids!
- Choking: avoid latex balloons and hard candies
- AND…Don’t forget to schedule your kid’s annual checkup.
But please, don’t stop here! Go read the complete article for lots more detailed information and related links.
(Too much serious stuff on my mind, to post serious material. Time for humor thanks to ScrubsMag.)
Excellent “wake-up call” article to all dads who are not/barely involved in their kids’ lives. Includes these terrific 10 Commandments of Righteous Fatherhood (as written by a dad):
1. No golf on weekends: Seriously, it’s ludicrous. Your spouse is home with the kids all the time, and you think it’s OK to take five hours on a weekend day to pursue your own pastime? Selfishness, thy name is Father.
2. Wake up: Literally, wake up. With your kids. On at least one of the two weekend days — and perhaps both. I know: you wake up early for work. Not even remotely the same thing. Rising alongside the kiddies is hard. And crazy. And (gasp!) sorta fun, if you’d just stop moping.
3. Change diapers: If you have little kids, and you don’t know how to change diapers (or, even worse, refuse to change diapers), you’re pathetic. That’s no exaggeration — p-a-t-h-e-t-i-c. It’s not all that hard, and though the poop sometimes winds up on the fingers, well, uh, yeah. It just does. Wash your hands.
4. Play with dolls and paint your toenails: How many fathers do I know who refuse to get girlish with their girls? Dozens. Dude, put aside the machismo, break out Barbie and slather on some pink polish. You’ll make a friend for life — and nobody else is watching.
5. Do things you don’t want to do: It’s easy to take the kids to the driving range — because you want to be there. Now try spending the day having a tea party at American Girl. Or crawling through one of those wormholes at the nearby kiddie gym. Fun? Often, no. But this isn’t about you.
6. Order the wife to bug off: I recently met a mother who told me her husband hadn’t been alone with their 9-year-old daughter for more than two hours … ever. Inexcusable. Let your wife do her own thing: relax, take a run, whatever. Entertain your children solo. They don’t bite (Note: CNN.com is not liable if your children do, in fact, bite).
7. Surprise! Just once, on a random day without meaning or purpose, show up early at your kid’s school/camp/wherever, say “Get in the car!” and take him/her somewhere special. Just the two of you, alone. A movie. A park. A hike. The memory lasts — I promise.
8. Dishes Don’t Clean Themselves (Nor Do Toys): It’s amazing how this one works. You pick up a dish, run it under hot water with some soap, rub it down with a towel and place it back on the shelf. Then repeat.
9. Wake up your kid: Not often. But if you want to score big points and create a killer memory moment, walk in Junior’s room at, oh, midnight, wake him/her up and go outside for 10 minutes to watch the stars.
10. For God’s sake, tell your kids you love them: They never see you, and they’d probably like to know.
Bud, as you read this your wife is expecting little — and your kids are expecting even less. Pull one out of the blue. Make Father’s Day less about you, and all about them.
Stop acting like your kids are an inconvenience to YOU! Stop making excuse after excuse, and even lies about why “this isn’t a good weekend to visit”, CALL them-for NO reason at all, ask how they are doing, how their day was…they are old enough now that THEY GET IT!
The First Annual Father’s Day Self-Reblog. Happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there. :)
What happens when you pay two monkeys unequally?
this video is more worth it than you can imagine
What is most interesting to me about this video is that the monkey getting the grapes carries on with his tasks as if not aware of the inequitable situation he is complicit in
Do you see what I am getting at
Seeing all these Fathers Day posts on Facebook is annoying and making me dislike my dad even more than I already did.
I keep having to remind myself that it’s the lionesses that do the hunting and killing and get their faces soaked in blood I mean is there a more badass animal
the king of the jungle
in the second it’s like ‘maybe if I look away she’ll stop yelling at me’
I TOLD YO BITCH ASS TO PICK UP THE CUBS
this is me